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Husband cheated
My husband has been flirting with others and now that girl has reached out to me explaining everything. He mentioned that he is divorced as i am mentally unstable and looking for support.
Now when he is caught he is telling me that he said nothing of this sort. Just light flirt. I am not sure what to do. He has done this before also
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marital therapy
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let's discuss
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It could be very confusing when one finds out that the spouse has been cheating on them. If they’ve done this before you know that it is a pattern, I can recommend that you seek couple therapy with me or with any other therapist of your choice.. but in case you are looking to find out answers to this pattern and continue living with him and have a healthier more responsible and trustworthy relationship. Both of you will have to learn ways to deal effectively with the cheating pattern of your partner and also for you to be able to recognise what is it in this relationship that you really are looking forward to. It’s also important for you to probably if not couple therapy, but seek therapy for yourself to help understand what you want in this relationship why are you in it, and if you continuing in the relationship, what bandwidth do you have to tolerate this pattern and continue living like this if at all, and what your options are in a relationship or marriage or living alone, or apart from the husband.
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I would suggest if you and your partner are ready, then go for couples therapy, and you can also go for individual therapy to understand yourself better and your needs in a relationship and what you’re coping and resilient style can be to effectively manage this situation and your relationship person
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Right now, instead of rushing into a decision, it may help to seek therapy for yourself. This will give you space to process your emotions, regain clarity, and decide what boundaries you need in your relationship. If your husband is open, coupleâs therapy could also be considered to address patterns of behavior and rebuild trust.
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Couple's Therapy
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Hi,
I'm sorry you're going through this difficult situation. Trust is essential in a relationship, and his inconsistent explanations and past behavior suggest a pattern of dishonesty and disrespect. Itâs important to prioritize your emotional well-being and consider seeking support from a trusted friend, family member, or counselor to help you navigate this. Open and honest communication is crucial, but if he continues to deny or minimizes his actions, it may be necessary to evaluate whether this relationship is healthy for you. Remember, you deserve respect, honesty, and support.
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Consult
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Seek help
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Hi
Thanks for reaching out. I understand what you are going through. Consult a psychologist and explain about your husband’s behaviour. I understand the situation is making you feel anxious and uncomfortable. Do take care of yourself.
When you explain about your husband’s behaviour with a psychologist it will help you feel better. A psychologist will guide you on what you can do about the situation..
It is important for you to take care of yourself and keep your mind occupied with activities that make you feel happy.
Next Steps
Consult a psychologist
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Contact me for counselling sessions. Along with counselling I can suggest natural foods to calm the mind.
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You both need a couple counseling sessions.
Meet an expert counseling psychologist asap.
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I have been working as a Homeopathic Psychiatrist and Counseling psychologist for the last 17 years. You can contact me through an online appointment for further assistance.
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He crossed boundaries. Even if he calls it “light flirting,” it wasn’t harmless if another woman felt invested enough to reach out to you. He lied about you, saying you’re divorced or “mentally unstable” is not a slip of the tongue, it’s character assassination. This isn’t about whether you’re “enough” as a wife. This is about his choices. He’s managing problems in the marriage (or within himself) by seeking outside attention and then gaslighting you when caught. That erodes trust.
Clarity through conversation
Sit him down in a calm but firm moment.
Say directly: “This isn’t about flirting. This is about lying, 3. disrespecting me, and breaking trust. Do you take responsibility, or not?”
Watch his response. If he keeps minimizing, you’ll know he isn’t ready to repair.
Next Steps
Consider involving a marriage counselor, a trusted elder in the family, or an imam — someone he respects and can’t dismiss easily. Sometimes outside accountability breaks denial.
Health Tips
If he says “it’s just light flirting”, respond calmly: “That doesn’t erase the lying and disrespect.” Decide what you will and will not tolerate. Boundaries aren’t threats, they’re lines of self-respect.
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Connect with psychologist it will be helpful to you to attain clarity and better deal with emotional conflict .
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connect
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consult
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Please know that this situation sounds incredibly difficult and painful. It's understandable that you're feeling confused, hurt, and unsure of what to do.
From a psychological perspective, it's clear that there are multiple layers to what you're experiencing:
1. Betrayal and Trust Issues: The foundation of a relationship is trust. When a partner engages in behavior like flirting or more, and then lies about it, it shatters that trust. The fact that this has happened before makes rebuilding that trust even more challenging.
2. Gaslighting: Your husband's denial ("He said nothing of this sort. Just light flirt") is a form of gaslighting. This is a manipulative tactic that makes you question your own perception and sanity. It's designed to make you feel like you are the problem, which can be incredibly disorienting and damaging to your self-esteem.
3. Emotional Turmoil: The conflicting information you're receiving which is the other person's account versus your husband's denial, can lead to significant emotional distress, anxiety, and self-doubt. It's crucial to validate your own feelings and not let his denials invalidate what you know to be true.
It's important to prioritize your well-being in this situation. Consider what you need to feel safe and respected. This might involve talking to a professional, such as a psychologist or therapist, to navigate these complex emotions and make a decision that is best for you.
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Hi
Your husband is showing a pattern of flirting and denial, even after being caught. This repeated behavior breaks trust and leaves you confused and hurt. It’s important to look beyond his excuses and notice the impact on your mental health and relationship.
You now have to decide whether you want to set clear boundaries, seek couple’s therapy, or protect yourself emotionally from repeated betrayal. The choice is about your well-being and dignity, not just his words.
Take therapy. You can connect with me on nine two six six seven two six zero six five.
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Mr. Fr Dr John Zachariah
Counselling Psychologist
9 yrs exp
Ernakulam
Consult a psychologist or sexologist
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consult our sexologist in Ernakulam 85*8985+3765
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Anjali Korath
Mental Health Counselor
3 yrs exp
Bangalore Rural
It sounds like youâre carrying a lot of emotional pain and uncertainty right now. From what youâve described , repeated experiences of your husband flirting, someone reaching out to confirm hurtful behavior, and now his denial â it makes complete sense that you're feeling confused, betrayed, and unsure of what to do next. When trust is broken like this, especially more than once, it can shake your sense of self. I want you to know that you're not alone in this. These are the kinds of situations that counseling can really help with not just to process whatâs happened but to help you reconnect with your self.
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Mr. Gunjan Maithil
Psychologist
13 yrs exp
Bangalore
Hi... Please consider professional help to address your marital issues. Marital Counselling works best when both the partners are willing to participate and change. But if that is not possible, you can seek Individuals Counselling to address your issues and reach to a decision. There are no generic solutions to such complex problems. Each couple and their situation is unique and their issues needs to be addressed as per their unique experience in their marital relationship.
Next Steps
Consult a Psychologist.
Marital Counselling is required.
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Mr. Gunjan Maithil
Senior Psychologist
Cell: nine six seven one three zero three one three four
Website: https://gunjanmaithil.wixsite.com/therapy
App: http://wix.to/fechb08?ref=cl
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Ms. Pavitra Somaiya
Counselling Psychologist
3 yrs exp
Indore
This might be very tricky to handle as you are going through an emotional turmoil along with the dilemma in your mind. To get clarity, consult with a psychologist.
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Ms. Rizwana Parvin T M
Counselling Psychologist
7 yrs exp
Coimbatore
Start couple counselling
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Ms. Avleen Kaur
Clinical Psychologist
4 yrs exp
Delhi
I hear the pain and confusion you are going through, and it’s completely understandable to feel hurt and uncertain in this situation. Your feelings are valid, and it’s important to take care of your emotional well-being first. You may want to take some time to reflect on what you want from this relationship and consider setting clear boundaries with your husband. Individual therapy could help you process your emotions and rebuild your confidence, and if both of you are open, couples therapy may provide a safe space to address issues of trust and communication. Please try not to internalize the negative labels he has used, as they can be manipulative and hurtful. Surround yourself with supportive people you trust, and remember that you deserve respect, honesty, and stability in your relationship.
Next Steps
To consult for therapy.
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Ms. Sanjana Dugad
Counselling Psychologist
5 yrs exp
Mumbai
please talk to a therapist or a trusted person in your life and explain the situation to figure the best way to navigate this
Health Tips
don’t internalize the betrayal. please talk to people you trust so you can process this better
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