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Loss of libido
My husband is 35 years old, and I am 29. We have been married for 2 years. However, five months into our marriage, I noticed that his sexual drive decreased. Prior to our marriage, during our three years of dating, he had a very high sex drive. When I addressed the issue with him, he didn’t provide a clear answer and often said he was just tired.
I would appreciate suggestions from psychologists and other medical professionals on how to overcome this problem.
Answers (11)
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Kindly consult psychotherapist
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Hi
A sudden decline in your husband’s sex drive after marriage, despite having a high libido before, can be due to multiple psychological, emotional, or physical factors. Since he avoids giving a clear answer and blames tiredness, it suggests that he may not fully understand the reason himself or may feel uncomfortable discussing it.
Common causes of reduced libido in men include stress, work pressure, hormonal imbalances (low testosterone), depression, anxiety, performance pressure, unresolved emotional issues, or even porn-induced desensitization. It’s also possible that relationship dynamics have shifted post-marriage, and emotional distance or routine stress is affecting his desire.
To address this, create a safe space for open, non-judgmental communication. Instead of focusing on his lack of interest, express your emotional needs and desire for intimacy in a way that encourages him to share his feelings. Avoid pressuring him or making it feel like a problem to solve immediately. Also, observe if he shows affection in other ways (cuddling, spending time, compliments) or if intimacy has decreased entirely. If this persists, a medical check-up (to rule out hormonal issues) and couples therapy can help uncover deeper emotional or psychological factors.
If he is open to it, therapy can help address any underlying stress, emotional blocks, or performance anxiety affecting his libido. If you want to take online therapy sessions, connect with me on nine two six six seven two six zero six five. I can guide you through strategies to improve intimacy and communication in your marriage.
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Hi
Next Steps
marital therapy
Health Tips
understanding, compassion , sense of freedom
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Hi,
Itâs understandable to feel concerned about changes in sexual desire in your marriage, especially when it differs from what you experienced during your dating period. First, itâs essential to foster open and honest communication with your husband about both of your needs and feelings surrounding intimacy. Approach the conversation with empathy, emphasizing that you're seeking to understand and support him rather than placing blame. There could be numerous factors contributing to his decreased sex drive, such as stress, fatigue, hormonal changes, or even underlying emotional issues. Encourage him to consider a health check-up to rule out any physical causes, as well as to discuss his feelings with a mental health professional if heâs comfortable. Additionally, seeking couples therapy can create a safe space for both of you to explore your intimacy challenges together and find ways to reconnect emotionally and physically. Patience and understanding from both sides will be essential as you work through this together.
Next Steps
consult
Health Tips
seek help
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Relationship stress, performance anxiety, or emotional changes might be playing a role. Therapy or counseling could be useful.
Next Steps
connect
Health Tips
consult
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Hi, Consult a psychologist for couple counselling
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There must be many psychological variables involved.
So a clinical psychologist specialist in subconscious Energy Healing Therapy will b helpful.
Next Steps
book an appointment with a clinical psychologist asap
Health Tips
try to chk out what makes him so tired
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Ms. Ruchi Goyal
Mental Health Counselor
9 yrs exp
Noida
He might be having some anxiety and he is not sure. Something is bothering him. He might be having some expectations from him. Which may be causing stress. Need to talk to him openly.
Next Steps
consult
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Ms. Hema Sampath
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
I would suggest both of you to consult a psychological Counselor who is also a Marriage Counselor to understand the root cause of the issue..
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For further discussion and understanding you can reach me.
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Ms. Rizwana Parvin T M
Counselling Psychologist
7 yrs exp
Coimbatore
It may be stress or performance anxiety, Connect with a counsellor for couple counselling.
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Ms. Neha Sachdev
Psychologist
11 yrs exp
Delhi
Hi
Usually after marriage, the partners take each other for granted. “We have all the time to get intimate” is what the common thought of the spouses. It can come from either of the spouses.
Prior to marriage- either men or women- they have their insecurities to lose the person and hence they put all their efforts to keep the partner hooked on in the relationship.
This is very common.
There can be responsibilities factor too. Now that you are married, he would have the stress financially and emotionally.
These are some of the adjustments/compromises that is prominent in a marriage.
Talk to him, have an open discussion with him, ask him about his thoughts on intimacy before and after marriage. Communicate your needs and explain the importance of sex in a marriage.
It’s very important to clarify that 60%of the marriage works on sex and intimacy. Or else the woman starts getting insecure and pulls herself back from the relationship
Next Steps
The discussion needs to take place when both of you are at peace and is open to discuss without blaming each other. This has to take place with honesty and with open mind.
Health Tips
Consult a psychologist for couple therapy.
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Disclaimer : The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.