Have night terrors, sometimes sees things that aren't there. Wake up to honking sounds in my ear. See a image of a scene during this. Had an accident at4, doc told mum trauma repressed my memory,so I dont remember. but now feel like its coming back. Exhausted from going outside. Shivers. Always on edge outside my safe space; my room. Too much stress. Mum and dad on divorce case, dad physically abused us, now have financial struggles, sister suddenly got
pregnant and financial burden worsened. Have extremely raging feelings to sister as she molested me when I was younger in my sleep. None believed. Tried putting it behind me in order to survive for my benefit. However, she had an accident and I didn't feel any real sadness. I was..almost glad. I don't know. Felt unnatural. worries piling. Mind going to a descent. Socializing has become a pain. Attempted suicide. Now feel hollow, don't cry but have odd feelings..like a hole in my being. Too much to say. Tried counselling&cbt, didnt help.