Feeling depressed. He just ignores it!

I have been depressed for about so many weeks now i feel like i have an emotionally abusive boyfriend we are in a relationship for about 5 yrs now n we broke up once and made out again i feel i am being controlled so much i donot have anyone left no friends no close ones just him in my life whom i can share this with.Weneva i tel my guy dt i wanna have ryt to decde n ma life he is like i cnt b dat cause i take wrong decsn alwys he keeps sayng dat n controls my life totally wen i m even right.I get feeling like i need to kill myself i even hurt myself often now have started drinkng feel like drinkng everydy but tryng to control myself from doing all this i have no idea wt do i do i am jus tryng to solve this relatnshp telng hm my needs but he just ignores it