Excessive anger and self harming behavir

I'm 26 years female having 9months old baby.I feel excessive anger ,that time I will hit my head on the wall or trying to slap on my head.this problems starts from my adolescents onwards. I think its a part of life,nothing to worry.it will cure when I become adulthood. During my study period I got 2episodes of panic attacks.some times I feel unwanted fear.some nights I didn't get sleep also.some unwanted thoughts coming in my mind which I don't want to remember.I feel depressed for simple things.now a days I feel angry to my small baby if she is crying or doing mistakes. Today I try to prepare rawa idly for my husband but its become flop.I feel something bad.my husband laughed at me.he says some jokes.I cried a lot.I hit my head.I make upma and give to him.then he told where is ur breakfast then I replied ,I don't want.he also didn't eat.then I feel angry .I forcefully try to feed him.while I got angry I will get extra power.by mistakenly upma falls to his eyes.some time i feel to die.