Anxiety tension. Know what i am lacking.

I was very overweight around 93 kilo in my school days , people used to tease me ,not a single boy approached me and that time I had a very low self esteem for which I develop a lifetime negative mindset about people that they think I look bad, but I know I don't .now I am 62 ,I reduce it with my efforts dedication discipline and now they tease me that I look malnourished .I was never good for anyone ,I failed in examz because I am not able to focus,my all friends have boyfriends or proposals in life but I don't. I think I am not worthy of any thing ,that's why no one ever asked me ..and after listening to all their love stories I think what I am lacking .I know God has plans for everything but I want to know what I am lacking .